At Least I Think I Do
by homegurrrllll
Summary: (Fionna's POV) Does Fionna love him? Or is her heart just confused?
1. Happy Birthday

Marshall Lee was hard to understand. One minute he loved me, next minute he was hissing at me. I never really understood why I stayed by his side. Maybe it was the way he could make me laugh, or how he aways protected me. Or maybe even his hair, as that was the reason for most of the ladies in Aaa, although most feared him. I had bruises on my arms from the places he would violently grab me. He would later understand what he had done, and kissed my wrists and apoligized until I had to tell him for the hundreth time that I was fine. Then later that night, he would fly me home, with a look of holding back tears. Shame, regret, he felt it too much. And my heart just wanted to fly onto his, just to let him know he was one of the most important people in my life. But he would never understad the way I did.

I was walking home from PG's party. Although it had been fun, I was tired and in tears walking home. Prince Gumball frustrated me, the way he played with my heart. One day, I was his favorite girl, the next, he had asked Paint Brush Princess if they could dance. It hurt. Bad. I had always had this dumb crush on him. But now it seemed like more of a disapointment. And at my 18th birthday party, too. I was confused on how I should react. Be happy and understanding? Be hurt and angry? I was leaning on a mixture of both, and I kicked a tree. My foot immediatley burned and chimed with that uncomfortable heart beat feeling. I sighed. To make things better, it started to rain.

I walked to the only place that would let me in. I was too messy to go back to the treehouse, and I imagined Cake was partying and later crashing with Mono. I knocked on the door and waited only a second before the door opened.

Marshall answered the door. When he saw me, his mouth stood open, and he looked confused.

"Fi? Aren't you supposed to be living it up down at PG's place?"

"Can I just...can you love me?"

I wasn't quite sure if I had said it right. How I wanted him to hold me close and play with my hair, to tell me I was pretty, to let me know how much he cared. I had never really known too much what love meant. Of course, I saw it when Cake and Mono were together. And my best friends loved me. But not actual love, the kind where it grows and grows until you love that person so much that there isn't a word in the whole world to describe how you feel.

I was in the shower, washing my hair and cleaning off all the dirt. I had later stepped out to slip on some of Marshall's clothes, which were old and soft, and smelled like him. I awkwardly entered the room where he was playing video games. I took a seat next to him on the floor, and set my head on his shoulder.

"Tell what he did." said Marshall.

"Nothing, its dumb. Can we not talk about it?" I replied.

"Its obviously bothering you if you walked 5 miles in the rain from your own birthday party. Tell me."

"You wouldn't understand."

"Tell me."

It took about 5 minutes of tensioned silence before I spoke up.

"Just when the last dance, the slow dance came on, PG asked Paint Brush Princess instead of me. And when she said yes, he smiled to me and whispered in my ear, "I think I'm in love!"."

I saw Marshall's eyes glimmer red for a second. He was mad at Gumball, as usual. Neitheir of us knew what to say.

"He's an idiot. He never notices how much you pry on him and how much useless time you spend trying to get him to notice you. And when you admit your feelings he takes them in such a neutral way, and makes it harder for you. And all you want to do is say how much you really do love him but the words never sound right or come out."

He sighed and turned his face away from me.

"You are the prettiest girl ever, even if some jerk doesn't notice it."

He seemed sad. More hurt than me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him in closer. He sighed and wrapped his arms around my waist.

That night, we spent it in his bed, cuddling. My heart was sore, like it was too happy to function. I was confused.

"You love PG, girl! Get over Marshall, he totally has no interest in you! Hes just doing this because he feels bad." I thought.

I could feel him rub my back and hum and song from years back. It felt warm. Marshall was actually lying on his bed. Marshall's bed was soft and warm, and comfortable. I figured the person who owned it before him broke it in. Marshall's warm hands eventually hypnotised me into a deep sleep.


	2. Storm

Two days after my sleepover with Marshall, I got over what PG had done. I didn't want to explain to Gumball how he had hurt me.

I was 18. 18! I was finally an adult, but still felt like my fiteen year old self. Adventuing, gaming, pranking. It was all the same.

Cake had decided to take me on a pranking spree through the Candy Kingdom that day. She wasn't happy with Gumball, and wanted us to add a little chaos to his perfect world. It was the usual easy pranks. Money on fishing line, flour high fives. The whole 360. Cake had asked me about Marshall, but I didn't feel like getting on the topic. I was super confused how I felt about him. I loved PG. I wanted him to love me back. But with Marshall, I wanted him to wrap his arms around me and never let go.

~\/~

Cake was going off on a trip with Mono. Supposedly the Ruby Caverns, but with Mono, there were always surprises. They were cooing at each other and Cake was blushing at Mono's words, so I figured they were going to be gone for a good while. A week or two was estimated, but I expected a month. I wanted Cake to be here to help protect me from my stupid boy problems, but I didn't want her to miss out.

A few days after they left, I had still been cooped up in the treehouse. I didn't feel like getting out. As childish as it sounded, I wanted to avoid my problems. That didn;t happen for long when the biggest storm Aaa has seen since The Great Mushrom War swept in. The power had been swiched off, and nighttime cast shadows round the room. BMO was uncharged, and lied out cold on the ground. I was alone. I felt scared. Normally, Cake would be there to huddle close to me and tell me about stories from before I was apart of the family. Now it was a hurricane outside. The treehouse was thick and sturdy, but it creaked and made scary noises as large rocks and sticks hit its sides. I pulled my knees to my chest and cried. I was scared. Confused. Alone.

Nothing made sense anymore. Everyone was so numb to my feelings, or didn't care to show me how much they liked me. Afterall, nobody had bothered to visit her in the past two weeks. And since Cake had been gone for 2 days now, I was truly alone. I cried because I didn't understand what I was feeling. I wanted Marshall to love me. And I wanted PG to love me. But did I? I didn't know.

I heard a loud thump from upstairs. The storm was stronger than ever now. I figured something broke through the window. Until I saw a bat swoop in.

In a flash, Marshall was standing there. I quickly hid my tears, wiping them off and sniffing in my girly emotions. He sat next to me and wrapped a blanket on me, kissing my cheek. I buried my face in his chest and quivered. It was cold and dark.

Marshall had sealed all the doors and windows. Its was so dark that I couldn't see my hand infront of my face, until he lit a candle and sat it on the tablet infront of me. It barely gave off enough light, but I could see the figure of Marshall floating to my side.

"How did you know to come?" I asked him quietly, almost whispering.

"You are terrified of being alone in a storm. I figured I'd drop by." He smirked.

I frowned, the feeling of heartache wash over me. Those beautiful eyes. That perfect smile. Was it mine? Or did it belong to another lucky girl? Did he feel anything? I looked away. he sighed and gritted his teeth.

"If you think I didn't care or I wasn't concerned, you arent thinking very clearly." He said.

I didn't know what to do. Should I make a joke? Should I stay silent.

"I love you Fi, stop crying."

I didn't even notice that I had been crying. I wiped my eyes as I realized what he had said.

"You...w-what?"

"Nothing." he returned.

"You know Marsh, I'm really confused right now about how I'm supposed to feel. I love PG and I want him to feel the same, but I'm not Queen material, and I know now that I'm not his type. I'm not dainty or well mannered, and I don't have a princess attitude. And you. When i'm around you my heart aches. Like it wants you but I'm caught in the middle of thinking you dont love me and you don't want to love me. And when you say "I love you" I wonder if you do like I love you. And its just frustrating a-and.."

I started to cry. I didn't care.

Marshall grabbed me with a strong hold and flipped my over on the couch. He pinned me down and looked me in the eyes. He bent down and kissed my eyes. His lips made his their way to me forehead and he stood still in time, lips on my skin. His lips later moved down to me ears, pressing against the side of my cheek.

"I love you more than I should. I want to run with you through the woods. Kiss you on the cheek and stroke your hair. Tell you that I miss you even when you're there."

he silently sang in my ear.

He let my arms loose and I wrapped them on his neck. He wrapped his arms around my back and kept singing.

"You're so beautiful when you're mad. When you cry I want to help you through the pain you've had. I'd marry you if i could. But that doesn't prove love like it should. I can be the stars to your dark days. But baby I'll be broken if you walk away."

His lips moved accross my cheek to my lips. He looked in my eyes. I pressed harder on his back, giving him approval. His lips felt cold, but very much alive. And we kissed. it was interesting, locking lips with my best friend. But it felt like more than that. And it was.


	3. Date Night

It was dark out when I woke. Not because it was late, but the storm was still brewing over the sky, blocking the sun. A warm sensation was felt on my back as I turned around to see Marshall holding me. We were lying in my bed, both curled up in my sleeping bag. I blushed, noticing how little space there was between us. Marshall opened his eyes and yawned, stretching his arms and pulling me back in closer. We laid like that for a few minutes, his eyes on mine.

"So what now." he said.

"What do you mean?"

Marshall looked down at me, where his arms were.

"I guess...I don't know. We haven't even been on a date." I said.

Marshall smirked and pulled me closer, kissing my cheek.

"Silly human girl." he said, riding his hand down my leg and up my skirt. I pushed his hand away and back to my hip, wrapping my arms around him. He pretended a frown and pulled me closer.

I was different from my 13 year old self. I had been chubby, with a childish voice and awkward clothing. Being 18, I had thinned out to a skinny athletic body. My voice had gotten higher, and more smooth (not lispy like before) and I wore pants. I guess I had grown tired of wearing a skirt, and the older I got, the more perverts I had to face, if you know what I mean. Although I still more my bunny hat. That would never change.

I ran my finger tips over the scars on Marshall's neck. I lightly massaged them, making him sigh in happiness.

Marshall was different. He was attractive, with feathery black hair and dark eyes. He had always been much taller than me. And he appeared to be 19, although Marshall wasn't sure when he had stopped growing.

~VVVVVV~

I was sitting on the couch, playing BMO while Marshall strummed his bass and sucked the red out of strawberries. BMO eventually got bored, and went off somewhere to play spy. I laid down on the couch, staring at the ceiling. The bass noise stopped, and Marshall floated over me, smirking. I reached my arms up to try and pull him down, but he kept going higher. I laughed and laid back down, my blonde hair surrounding me.

"Marshie, come heree." I sugarcoated.

He was still smirking, looking at my chest. I was confused ar first until I looked down. My old worn out sleeping shirt had been stretched out over the years, exposing my um well...you know.

I shrieked in terror and lifted my shirt up, face red and mortified.

"It was fun while it lasted." I heard Marshall mumble under his breath. I lightly punched him in the arm, but he just laughed and sighed.

"Oh dear glob." I groaned.

Marshall didn't notice, smiling to himself. I quickly took off his shoe and ran. I made my way all the way downstairs and outside, running with his shoe. He chased after me. He eventually knocked me over in the warm, tall grass. He grabbed his shoe and put it back on. I tried to get out of his straddle but he pinned me down.

"Going so soon?" he said, sicking out his forked tongue and showing off his red eyes. I pushed him off and pinned him down, sticking out my tongue. He grabbed my blonde hair and smirked at me.

"My house, tonight at 12. You. Me. Scary movie. Shoulder to hide on." he said, tapping his left shoulder.

"As long as you turn on the heat." I replied.

"Never." he said.

~VVVVVVV~

I walked up to Marshall's house, feeling nervous for some reason. It's not like I never came to his house, but more that it was different this time. As soon as he opened the door, he smiled, looking me up and down.

I had worn my hair in my bunny hat, and worn an old tight blue dress from when I was 16. Marshall looked good, I thought as I blushed. He was wearing a blue plaid button up shirt was black skinny jeans and grey converse. He smelled like cologne and his hair looked like every preteen girl's dream.

He invited me in, tapping a seat on the couch as he floated. There was popcorn and chocolate and strawberries on the tabler, along with red drinks and water. I sat on the couch, and jumped right back up, squealing in pain. His couch was rock hard. I had never sat on his couch since I was younger, and somehow it managed to go from uncomfortable to painful. I usually sat on the floor to play games with him.

He looked frustrated at himself, thinking of the next move. In the very next minute, he turned into a fuzzy creature. At first I was startled, until I saw what he really was. A giant, fuzzy, bat-like creature, with cute eyes and black soft fur. He sat on the couch. I climbed on the couch next to him and sat in his lap. He purred and sounded embarrased with himself. I grabbed clumps of his fur and pulled him closer. He was so warm and soft. I took off my heels and pulled off my bunny hat. He purred even louder and I rubbed his tummy.

"You're so cute Marshie, I'm never getting over this." I said.

The movie started and I leaned back in him, enjoying myself


	4. The reason

Once he movie ended, Marshall turned back into his normal vessel. He smirked as I blushed, noticing that I was still in his lap. I moved to the floor, him following after me like a lost puppy.

"Can I ask you something?" He said.

"Shoot"

"You could have any guy on your pinky finger with the clap of your hands, yet you choose the vampire...why exactly?" he asked.

"I'm not sure how to explain it." I said, leaning my head on his shoulder. "The best way I can put it? After adventuring and slaying the beast, saving all the princes and such...you seem like the only one who would put bandages on my cuts. Around you...I don't have to be some amazing adventurer saving everyone, and being tough enough to take care of my own wounds. I'm just me."

"But what about dumball? I thought you had feelings for the pink glob."

"Back when I was totally head over heels for him? Back then, feeling needed was my pride and joy. And PG needed me...alot. Looking back on it now, he only needed someone to save his back. I never had a chance of being the future queen of Candy, if thats what you're asking. I still had a little love in my heart for him at the dance...He's dating Paint Brush now anyways. And he needs a queen. Theres no chance of me and him. Besides, I have you."

~VVVVVVVVVVV~

**AUTHORS NOTE**- Hey guys! You are all super awesome for reading! Thanks for leaving the nice reviews and following the story. I plan to wrap it up in a few chapters here, so if you have any advice or comment about what to add to the fiolee, let me know! (Sorry this is a short chapter, writers block)


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